The overpaid and seldom-read newsletter editor is taking two weeks off on furlough and thank you to Mr President for approving it.
So this will be the last email probably until Sunday, January 7, while his brood gets in the way.
With that in mind, there is plenty of golf and plenty of run to be had at Linton throughout that period so please check the dates listed at the foot of this missive (above the jokes).
A few committee members (methinks Barry Jeffrey, Geoff Ross, Dave Rohde, Colin Offord) including vice club captain Steve Harvey are available to be panicked if anything turns to…. cabbage.
Au revoir and Mere Christmas!
They were warned by the meteorologists and sure enough the heatwave abated as torrents arrived from the west.
Players on the course took shelter under trees but it was so hot (25 degrees) and benign  no one was bothered, except barman Ian Gardner who found himself minus a brolly. There were enough breaks in the downpours for everyone to finish off 18 holes.
Only seven players turned up for the $2 haggle which was won by Tau Pokoati with his 89 off a 20 handicap from Peter Lampp (87/15) ahead of Ian Gardner (93/19).
Dave Rodhe had the lowest gross of 83 but he had to post 38 on the back nine to get it done.
New member Ray Wallis, who has played previously at Palmerston North and Manawatu and is also a member at Omanu (Mt Maunganui), was welcomed to the haggle.
Thanks to Ian Gardner for clearing the course bins.
Sunday scores: 39 Tau Pokoati; 35 Peter Lampp; 34 Ian Gardner; 33 Graham Cockburn, Merv Ray; 30 Dave Rohde; 21 Ray Wallis.
Two: Dave Rohde on 17.
Man in Pink: The Rohdster set to attack the 18th green from the fairway today.
Dave Rohde often laments that in his many years of golf he hasn’t had a hole in one.
Well physically he has after dunking his 3-wood into the hole on the second on Saturday. The pin was located up at the left back of the green and is one of the longest par 3s in Manawatu-Wanganui.
Unfortunately for Dave, he wasn’t playing with a marker so it can’t be ratified officially, but his Dotgolf scorecard still records a green 1, just reward for a gent who works on his game most days.
The previous ace on No 2 was by Steve ”Tick” Whitcombe in 2014 wielding a 3-wood when witnessed by Ian Gardner. Before that there was one by Bruce Churchill in 2002, or thereabouts.
So did the sublime weather on Friday which had just a subtle westerly wafting into half of the holes. The course was a summery picture.
The field of 21 enjoyed the festivities well organised by our chancellor Derek Dilks.
The raffles were $2 tickets and despite there being plenty of prizes and many bagging two, those of us who usually dip out went home clutching at excuses again.
Many thanks to Derek’s catering fare in the form of nicely-filled rolls and his sane format which included three mulligans and the bottom score on one hole discarded while sensibly  playing off the yellow tees.
We had apologies from Sheryl Rackham who bolted off to Western Australia.
Friday’s scorers: 24pts Cynthia Luckham, Graham Irvine; 23  Roy Dobbin, Graham Cockburn, Jol Claridge, Merv Ray; 22 Peter Lampp, Bruce Gibbons, Dave Finegan; 21 Dave Rohde, Brian Davies, Colin Offord, Graeme Alltree; 20 Eugene Wilson, Huia Niall, Derek Dilks; 19 Ross Hardyment, Jack Finegan, James Wharemate; 18 Barry Jeffrey; 17 Vivien Jones.
# A printout by handicapper Dave Rohde shows we have 100 club members on our handicap listing which for once is a healthy situation.
The secondary memberships have also  been a success.
Thirteen of those still have handicaps pending so our next aim must be to get them over the line.
That does not include the multitude of defence force personnel who play on many miscellaneous membership categories. We are seeing increased numbers of military playing the course which can only be good for Linton’s future.
# Greenkeeper Eugene went out after work on Thursday for 18 with club member James Chapman and shot 73. It might have been Eugene’s record, but for some reason he missed a putt on the 17th for a bogey!
Altogether, a tidy score to have on permanently on your record.
# One of the club’s esteemed members, Roger Martin, came nicely out of anaesthetic on Thursday back into the world and was reportedly in good health as he started his careful recovery to a new computerised golf swing!
# It was good to see former left-handed Linton pennants player Roger McEwan back at the club after many years away.
He is often coming out guiding daughter Olivia to be the next Lydia.
Roger was an accomplished cricketer as a Manawatu rep wicketkeeper-batsman and played alongside Derek Dilks at the Palmerston Cricket Club (The Raucous Redcaps). Roger, from memory, was also a NZ under-23 wicketkeeper.
# We urge new members to pop along to club days on either Wednesdays, Fridays (nine holes) or Sundays. You will find the members a welcoming, happy, harmless bunch of very mixed abilities.
Should anyone need introducing, our Tokomaru teacher Colin Offord will usually be there – so just holler ”Teach”, but loudly!
Everyone should also know that we have permanent clean-and-placing through the green on the course because of the omnipresent rough. Best remedy, hit the thing straight!
Monday: Christmas Day – self start.
Tuesday: Dec 26 Boxing  Day – self start.
Friday: Dec 29 9-holes haggle (Colin Offord in steerage)
Sunday: Dec 31, Linton Open Classic (usually Steve Harvey’s baby).
Monday: New Year’s Day stableford haggle or self start.
Wednesday:  Jan 3 – Vets’ haggle run by the club.
Friday: Jan 5 – 9-holes club haggle (Graeme Alltree presiding).
Sunday: Jan 7 – Club haggle – par.
Wednesday: Jan 10 – Midweek vets’ club day.
Thursday: Jan 11 – Opening round of Golden Coast Vets, Palmerston North GC.

Club Days

Sundays 9:30 tee off

Wednesday Vets 9:30 tee off

Friday 9 Holers 9:30 tee off